in so many ways... part of my living room... my mind... rite now i'm sitting in the dark in my bro's room using my dad's laptop (since i have yet to get my very own)... and the reason why i didnt want to switch on the lights is so dat two lil rascals wont noe dat ders anyone in the room... hehe..

gosh juz moments ago der was soooooo much noise i juz wanna scream... but i cant really do dat if the rascals' parents themselves aint doing anything to stop the madness... i mean, are they deaf or they dun care dat their kids are behaving as such... gosh i'm juz not sure... makes me tink wat kind of parent i'll be if i have my own brood... i mean some people say dat people in my profession either make the worst or best parents... i guess u turn out to be the latter when u spend ur life taking care of people's kids, u kind of not noe wats happening to urs... like some pple may be the DM at work but they cant control their own kids... and they grow up to be such a nitemare... gosh... when u wonder wat went wrong its kinda too late... coz they'll be all grown up and of coz wont listen to wateva u say... they'd most likely do the total opposite...

juz recently, i was listening to my dear cuzin lamenting... we're kinda in the same freaking boat... part-time parents to kids that are not ours... and wondering wat goes on in the minds of weekend parents... are we being selfish? overly-sensitive? unduely irritated? i mean both us are not married, we do not have children so maybe we shold juz keep our mouths shut since we probably dont noe wat its like to juggle work and family... but then again isnt dat smtg they chose for themselves... like noone put a agun to their heads to settle down and start a family... so why isit dat we (the singles) have to sacrifice our freedom (and sanity at times) juz so dat we could tend to their kids...

my mum was juz saying, earlier in the day while we were doing our cleaning up, dat she had never asked anyone to take care of her kids for her... not even for a day... well, times have changed dear mum... we will definitely enjoy the company of their kids when they wanna hang out wif frens or watch a movie or any other activity dat should not involve kids... and it irritates the h**l out of me ( and my cuzin) when our mums complain abt the situation... but never did say or do anything abt it... we'd be like... "why are we getting the lecture? tell it to them! we didnt pile our kids on u!" in fact, we had to play a big fat part in the babysitting... and mums cant say no bcoz tak sampai hati and all dat crap... kesian and wateva... wat abt me!!! hello... who's gonna kesian me, huh?

lucky thing the kids are cute... but no matter how cute, when they get irritating u juz wanna scream ur head off and tell them to bugger off... sigh... its juz a sad situation... its a constant dilema dat some of my colleagues are facing today... if u work, someone's gotta take care of ur kids... u cant be der all the time... but at the same time, i cant help but wonder... while some feel guilty about not being der for their kids, der are those who are more than glad to deposit their kids somewer... be it with their parents, in-laws or childcare centres... its as if a big load is off their shoulders or smtg... hehe... and we go like... wat the h**l... dun they realise that when they decide to make a baby, their whole life will change...? dat no matter wat, the kids come first...? dat ders sooooo amny things (or luxuries) dat u have to forego...? well i guess a saying i once came across is true... anyone can be a father but not everyone can be a daddy... guess the same goes for mothers and mummies...

i hope i have not offended anyone by writing this entry... hehehe... juz my thoughts on how not easy it is to have a family in present day spore... and i guess i learnt smtg (or learnt lots) by being a single woman still living wif my parents and unwittingly dragged into the babysitting bisnes... *sigh*

Prison Break 2 is starting soon, in a few minutes... hehehe i'm still xcited even tho i have watched the first 13 episodes of this season on the net during the last dec hols... hmmmm lets see... wat are the chances dat i'll get to watch in peace... hehehe yup u got dat rite cuzin... very slim... double trouble will start the moment i step out of this room... sheesh... the story of my life...